The Best Defense Against Taking Offense

Our Best Defense Against Taking Offense

Although the Tennessee Titans and their new quarterback Marcus Mariota play in Nashville, this post is not about football. It is about not being offended by the words and/or actions of others.

Heaven knows that we all have many opportunities to be offended with people everyday. As human beings, we don’t exactly treat each other with gloves of kindness. We all sometimes slip up and say and/or do bad things to other people. And when we do somebody wrong, those of us who are Christ-followers we are called to humbly acknowledge it to them, and then to do our best to make it right. Love is being willing to say “I’m sorry.” And a sincere apology usually releases the person we have done wrong to, from the torment of being offended at us.

But what is our defense against offense when someone hurts us and refuses to say “I’m sorry.”? What if they say they were right to say and/or do what they did? In that case it is very difficult not to be inwardly tormented by a spirit of taking offense. However, if we allow the torment of offense to get a hold on our heart, it will make us seethe with anger, resentment, and bitterness and eventually drive us to retaliation and revenge.

So what can we do when a spirit of taking offense is pounding down our heart’s door?

1) Pray, pray, pray and then pray some more! “Lord, help me not to take this offense at this person and what he did to me!”
2) Bless, bless, bless and then bless some more! “Lord, I ask you to bless (name of person). Bless his health, bless his finances. Bless his relationships. Bless his family. Bless his activities. Give him your peace. Heal his hurts. (You get the idea.)
3) Confess your struggle with offense to someone you trust. Have them pray over you and rebuke the spirit of offense from you. If necessary, get several people to help you do this.
4) Refuse to think bad thoughts about the person who has done you wrong. Fight to drive anger, resentment, bitterness, revenge, and retaliation out of your mind and heart.
4) Don’t surrender. The spirit of offense can be relentless. However, though the help of the living, resurrected Jesus you can overcome it and drive it out of your heart. Don’t give in to offense. Keep resisting it until you overcome it!

Here are a few quotes to help you win the battle against the spirit of offense:

“Don’t let hard lessons harden your heart.” — Carlos A. Rodriguez:

“To be offended is a choice we make; it is not a condition inflicted or imposed upon us by someone or something else.” –David A. Bednar

“Whenever anyone has offended me, I try to raise my soul so high that the offense cannot reach it.” –Rene Descartes

“We cannot choose who offends us, but we can choose how to respond when we are offended.” –Moffat Machingura

“Getting offended is the bait of Satan for the believer.” –David McGee

When you are offended at any man’s fault, turn to yourself and study your own failings. Then you will forget your anger. — Epictetus

“When things start to get rough, you find comfort in your faith. Knowing that no matter what, you can dust yourself off and be okay.” –Marcus Mariota


About Steve Simms

I like to look and think outside the box. In college I encountered Jesus Christ and I have been passionate about trying to get to know Him better ever since. My wife and I co-lead a non-traditional expression of the body of Christ in Nashville based on open participation and Spirit-led sharing. We long to see the power and passion of the first Christ-followers come to life in our time. I have written a book about our experiences called, "Beyond Church: An Invitation To Experience The Lost Word Of The Bible--Ekklesia" that is available in Kindle & paperback @
This entry was posted in anger, apology, being offended, bitterness, Carlos Rodriguez, David Bednar, David McGee, Epictetus, how to apologize, How to forgive., how to not take offense, Marcus Mariota, Moffat Machingura, Quotations, Rene Descartes, resentment, retaliation, root of bitterness, unforgiveness and tagged , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

2 Responses to The Best Defense Against Taking Offense

  1. The people who suffer from an offense the most are those who want to avenge it compared to those who simply let it go.

    The Avenger harbours feelings of offense, and they keep ruminating on the feelings in order to continually justify their vengefulness.

    THE PROBLEM IS: the feelings of offense hurt us as strongly as the offense itself. No matter how hard it maybe, we all must make a decision to let go.

    As I recently said on focus on keep yourself rather than keeping the world – that’s how to keep yourself intact in this life.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s